It will get easier....

That's what everyone kept telling her..."It will get easier." But that wasn't the truth. It was getting harder and harder. She couldn't even keep the tears inside now until she left the nursing home. She had no control over the emotion that flowed from her each time she went there. So the visits became less and less. It was just unbearable and she hated the thought that her tears may upset her mom even more than she already was. The phone calls were easier but it was becoming harder and harder to communicate with her mom on the phone. Alzheimer's was winning. And to hear those occassions where her mom cried? It just tore her apart. Just like someone had opened up her heart and stepped on it over and over again.
How was she ever going to get a grip?......
How was she ever going to control the tears?........
How was she ever going to accept the unchangeable truth?.....
How was she ever going to understand why?........
Life just isn't fair and it isn't right that good people suffer such sick, twisted fates?.....
And we are just suppose to accept and move on? How can that be?
I don't understand.....and it's not right or fair...
Her Dad was fighting his own battle. The good news was few and far between. They were do for some good news. She just felt so helpless. The two most important people in her life and she was just powerless. Could only watch and suffer along with them. Life shouldn't be this hard. It shouldn't be so crappy. People work hard their whole lives, bust their ass, do everything that is asked of them and this is the thanks they get when they get older? You can't tell me that's fair. You can't tell me it will get easier......................

Summer...

The summer goes so fast here in the midwest. There is just not enough time to enjoy the nice weather. Before you know it the summer is over. I like having all four seasons. I just wish they were a little more evenly proportioned. Summer definitely get's the short end of the stick. I tried my hand at camping this year for the first time. I went out with my brother and his wife. It was actually VERY cool. I had my doubts. But I liked it and would definitely do it again. I will have to post a pic of my high profile tent! ha-It was the dwarf of the campground and people thought it was for our dog, but hey who cares. It was cheap, and I like it!